100 Questions We Honestly Want to Ask Hollywood

If we just knew the answers to these questions, we'd never ask, "What were they thinking?" again.

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1 Where is Roberto Benigni's "off" button?

2 Why is it that as less happens in movies, they get longer?

3 What did Elia Kazan ever do to Amy Madigan?

4 If Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace doesn't make more money than any film in history in the first 10 days, is it a failure?

5 If George Lucas is the ultimate organization freak, why does Episode I come fourth?

6 Why do people pay what they do for snacks at the movies?

7 Are any of Gwyneth Paltrow's relatives doing well?

8 How did Madonna, who hails from Bay City, Michigan, get a mid-Atlantic accent?

9 Is there any performer in Hollywood who hasn't altered his or her appearance in some artificial way?

10 Why does every story about Michael Ovitz make the front page of The New York Times business section?

11 What are the Golden Globes a front for?

12 How much of Hollywood dabbles in heroin? And how much of Hollywood is really serious about it?

13 Why has Michelle Pfeiffer wasted so much of her talent?

14 What is Tom Cruise going to do instead of aging?

15 Exactly what compensation do stars receive for wearing a specific designer's clothes?

16 Why doesn't Harrison Ford let someone else choose his leading ladies?

17 Why doesn't the Academy report totals in Oscar voting?

18 If Calista Flockhart isn't anorexic, what do they call that dress size?

19 What else is wrong with Calista Flockhart?

20 Why are there so few good women directors?

21 Why are there so few good men directors?

22 As the population over 30 grows larger and larger, why has Hollywood narrowed its sights to the younger and younger?

23 If Hollywood has narrowed its sights to the younger and younger, who decided The Out-of-Towners was a good idea?

24 What, exactly, happened to Adrien Brody in The Thin Red Line?

25 Can anyone name five cities in America that do not now have film festivals?

26 Why does Warren Beatty still assume that everyone knows who he is?

27 With Dolby and THX and digital sound, et cetera, why is it hard to hear what people say in movies?

28 Who let Pamela Anderson get her breast implants removed?

29 Why does Robert De Niro agree to have that cup of coffee with Al Pacino in Heat?

30 Why did no one notice Queen Elizabeth in the audience at Romeo and Juliet until she announced her presence in Shakespeare in Love?

31 How come the film in the projector is upside down and the wrong way round?

32 How can Elisabeth Shue do Leaving Las Vegas and then go back to being Elisabeth Shue?

33 How come Mike Figgis can do Leaving Las Vegas and then go back to being Mike Figgis?

34 What happened to Bill Pullman in The Thin Red Line?

35 How do we tell which films Nicolas Cage is doing for art from those he's doing for money?

36 Why does Patricia Arquette get cast so much more often than Rosanna Arquette?

37 Why do they make the new James Bond films seem as if they were all made in 1962?

38 Who masterminded Billy Bob Thornton's makeover?

39 Is Jack Valenti hoping Colin Powell will give him a job?

40 What is the point of the R rating, except to allow movie theaters to make money and have an alibi?

41 Is there a direct relationship between the number of life achievement awards and the overall absence of achievement?

42 Why did they keep John Travolta in The Thin Red Line?

43 Why did Al Pacino's acting get so much worse after he won his Oscar?

44 What is Debra Winger doing these days?

45 Was tap dancing supposed to be a metaphor for the bullets flying on Omaha Beach in Saving Private Ryan, or is Debbie Allen the worst time-consuming blight on the Oscars?

46 Why is Steven Spielberg still so uneasy in public?

47 Do Gwyneth Paltrow and Harvey Weinstein actually talk when they're not onstage together at awards shows?

48 Why did Molly Ringwald go away while Demi Moore stayed?

49 What would have happened to Ed Harris if he'd had hair?

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