Rob Lowe: High on Lowe

"What made you do that ridiculous song-and-dance routine with Snow White at the Academy Awards?" I ask.

Lowe groans. "The Academy called and asked if I would sing 'Proud Mary' with Snow White. I thought it was a little goofy, but, hey, who was I to argue with the Academy? I figured if it didn't turn out well, it would be no different than doing a stand-up act for the first time and bombing. Except that the audience wasn't The Comedy Store--it was Meryl Streep, Tom Cruise, every studio head, and a billion people watching at home. I remember being in the middle of the song--I'm singing 'Rolling, rolling'--and I look into the audience, and what I see is blur, blur, blur, Barry Levinson, blur, blur. I look back to Barry Levinson, and he's got the most stupefied expression on his face. He turns to the person next to him and I see his mouth moving and he's saying, 'What the fuck is he doing?' I almost stopped in my tracks I was so mortified. But I finish the song, go backstage, and I hear this woman say, 'Young man, that was so fabulous, that's just what this show needed, come sit with me. I didn't know you were such a good singer.' I look up and there's Lucille Ball smiling at me. So I sat with Lucy and that's all she wanted to talk about. That was funny,' she said. 'Funny and sexy.' I sat and watched the show with her, and I'm thinking, I did it, it worked! Fucking Lucille Ball liked it! Afterward, at the Governor's Ball [movie critic] Sheila Benson told me she thought it was very funny. So really, I went to bed that night thinking everything was hunky-dory."

"And you woke up in the morning and found out you were more reviled than Hitler," I say.

"Exactly. I had bombed in front of the whole world. What I learned is that people take the Academy Awards as seriously as the cure for cancer in this town. And when you're unveiling the formula of the cancer cure, I guess you don't want anybody hoofing it up with a cartoon figure. To top it all off, the producer of the show had neglected to get a licensing arrangement with Disney. Still, I think I would have seemed like an ingrate if I'd turned the Academy down [in the first place]."

"The Academy should have had you back the next year as a presenter, to show that they were behind you and all."

"That's a sweet idea, Martha, and if you ever become the head of the Academy ... But you know what? If they called tomorrow and asked me to do it again, I would. That's part of why people don't know what to do with me. That's Barry Levinson going, 'What the fuck is he doing?' I don't know! They don't know. They never have known. Because I am the guy who will do stuff like that. That's the good news. And sometimes it's the bad news."

Right now all I want to do is throw my arms around Lowe and make him feel better. "When I was a little girl, my mother used to say to me, 'You're really funny and you can make people laugh, and that's going to make you cry.' Now I know what she means."

"Oh, how great," says Lowe, reaching for a pen. "I think that expression is going to lift up and see the light of day in another medium."

Lowe then lights up a Havana cigar and hands me one. We sit in the deepening afternoon light and slowly puff away. "You're a good sport," he says, handing me the ashtray. "Most people throw up in the pool the first time."

This is not exactly what I need to hear. I'm gulping air and trying not to turn green. "How do you see yourself in 10 years? Do you want to act and direct, like Clint Eastwood?"

Before I can finish the thought Lowe is knocking on wood. "Clint is my hero, so, sure, that sounds good. But I'm open to anything. I'd like to do comedies. Shit, I'd like to do an action adventure. As usual, Rob Lowe will do just about anything." He leans back, puffs his cigar, surveys his kingdom, and lets a slow, satisfied grin cross his face.

"I know someone in L.A.," I tell him, "who refers to you and your wife, and Jeff Bridges and his wife, and Dennis Miller and his wife, and Bob Zemeckis and his wife as The Happily Marrieds."

"All those people are my friends--we all live up here, we all have kids, we get together for Halloween, things like that. But you know what's funny? I hear a bit of contempt in that, like we're lesser for being happy and committed. When I was a party boy, people berated me for not having a wife and family. Now, when I've found the truest fulfillment of my life, they're snide about us being happy. Well, fuck them. I've done both, and I'll tell you, waking up next to someone you love beats all that other crap."

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Martha Frankel interviewed Kelly Preston for the April '97 issue of Movieline. Check out more about Martha Frankel here!

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