· Pop quiz! Whose gnarled, pale hand is this? The answer is after the jump!
· Why, that's Edward Cullen's paw on a brand new New Moon poster, clutching Bella with all his vampire might as her eye wanders to the shirtless wolfcake replacing a motorcycle carburetor just a few yards away. Hang on tight.
· Are we sick of pop culture porn parodies yet? We are. Are we going to keep talking about them? We also are. The latest to earn 15 minutes of ADD-addled blogger attention is Jon & Kate F**k Eight. (In a related story, the porn casting boards have put out an APB for "8 adorable, Asian midgets.")
· Guess who!
· Good news: Gov. Schwarzenegger was able to get some forearm curls in as he surveyed the staggering wreckage of the Station fire. Bad news: It was arson.
· Proud Jew-fetishist Serena Williams clearly misses Brett Ratner, as she's placed an ad on Hebraic virtual matchmaking service, JDate.
· In his first interview since Paula's American Idol departure, Simon Cowell described the new judging table dynamic as "different. It's like comparing a carrot to a banana." Translation: Kara DioGuardi is an orange stick, whereas Paula is sweet and nuts.