Star Trek 2 Gets A Title: Where Does It Rank In The Franchise?

Star Trek 2 Title

What's in a name? J.J. Abrams' Star Trek reboot sequel finally has one (per Deadline) and despite my deepest, nerdiest hopes that early reports were on some crazy tip it's been confirmed so I guess we're stuck with it. I hope you're ready for — drumroll please... Star Trek Into Darkness. Star Trek into what now!?

I'm sure it was tough to come up with a naming convention that deviated from the original Trek movies' Roman numeral + subtitle formula, or the TNG-era Treks' annoying penchant for terribly vague one-word descriptors ("Nemesis"? "Generations"?). At least those made more sense once you saw the movie.

But Star Trek Into Darkness? For starters, it sounds like Step Into Liquid and Step Up 2 The Streets, which makes me think Chris Pine and Co. are headed for a dance-off with outer space surfers to the music of a British glam rock band. On top of that, dropping the colon forces us to comprehend "Trek" as both a noun and a verb, which makes my brain hurt. Who wants to go Star Trekkin' with J.J. Abrams?

[*Commenter Elijah Sarkesian is right: Maybe someone just forgot the colon. If that's the case then I forgive Abrams and will move Star Trek: Into Darkness into #10 right under Star Trek: Insurrection, because "insurrection" is at least an interesting vocabulary word.]

Maybe I'm being too harsh on poor Star Trek 2. Looking back on the Trek films, they weren't all winners. Here's how I'd rank the 12 franchise titles, from awesome (KHAAAAAAAN!) to turrible.

1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
2. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
3. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
4. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
5. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
6. Star Trek: The Motion Picture
7. Star Trek: First Contact
8. Star Trek
9. Star Trek: Insurrection
10. Star Trek: Nemesis
11. Star Trek: Generations
12. Star Trek Into Darkness

Yep. Still not working.

Sound off below. Together we can get through this, guys.

Star Trek 2 is in theaters May 17, 2013.

[TrekMovie.com, Deadline]



Comments

  • Meh. I'm waiting for an official announcement from Paramount or Bad Robot, hoping that they'll at least include a colon. Star Trek: Into Darkness, I can buy. Star Trek Into Darkness, not so much.

  • Oranje says:

    The English major in me puts The Undiscovered Country #1.

  • Christmas 2019 says:

    "Star Trek: The Motion Picture" is the worst! Do you need the reminder when going to see the film that you were going to see a film? If so, you were having a lot more fun than I was at the time.

  • robert says:

    Title: What's in a title, Action speaks louder than words!

  • Kujibur says:

    If you're going to judge a movie by it's title or its punctuation, then DON'T see the movie. You're not the kind of fan the movie needs. Most Trek-fans will go to see it if it was called "Star Trek: Return of Kitty Meow Meow." Some of you might say you won't, but you know you'll go check it out just out of curiosity anyway.

  • Daniel says:

    This is my order of Trek films... (notice I took the liberty of adding the "colon" where it should be)

    1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
    2. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
    3. Star Trek: First Contact
    4. Star Trek (2009)
    5. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
    6. Star Trek: Nemesis
    7. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock
    8. Star Trek: Insurrection
    9. Star Trek: Generations

    10. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
    11. Star Trek: The Motion Picture

    (only ranked after seen) Star Trek: Into Darkness

    I would also go see "Star Trek: Return of Kitty Meow Meow"!!!

  • Skip says:

    I was hoping for "Star Trek With A Vengeance"

  • Star Trek V: The Final Frontier

    Awful movie, First Contact and Wrath of Khan tied at the top

  • max says:

    I hated the reboot, so whatever they call this movie does not make an iota of difference to me.

  • Ron J says:

    Wrath of Khan
    First Contact
    Star Trek
    bla
    bla
    bla
    .
    .
    .
    Last and Least: Save the Whales (Sorry, but the giant whale-cylinder from Galaxy X just makes me hurl even worse than Veeger, er, I mean Nomad...)

  • Star Trek Kitty Meow Meow!!!!!! IOh my god, just too FUNNY!!! ROFLMA. I love it!!!!! And you are right. I would go see Star Trek no matter what the name is!!!! I personally think too much attention is being put on the name. Who cares what the name is, just so long as it is STAR TREK!!!!!!:):):)

  • Tech42 says:

    Sounds like an episode of Pith Possum, Super-Dynamic Possum of Tomorrow!

  • Larry Thompson says:

    The best title far and away is simply "Star Trek". Anything else is superfluous. If I'm allergic to cat dander, should I pass on "Star Trek: The Return of Kitty Meow Meow"?

  • X says:

    Whatever it's called, the movie is still likely to be better than about 2/3 of the existing Star trek films.

  • Jack Frost says:

    Does anyone know where I can go see Star Trek: The Return of Kitty Meow Meow?

  • Tom Di Roma says:

    I find it interesting that a recent article on Voyager has it leaving our solar system the same way it did in the first star trek movie. Curious, isn't it? I wonder who or what it might meet out there?

  • typenter says:

    I bet Kujibur never expected "Return of Kitty Meow Meow" to penetrate as far into this comment section as it has.

  • cgz says:

    I don't care what it's titled. I just need me some more Star Trek.

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