Though The Avengers doesn't come out until May, it's already time to play the same game we did with Bridesmaids's first poster: Who goes hardest? Is it Robert Downey Jr. as Iron Man? Is it Scarlett Johansson as Natasha Romanoff? What about Jeremy Renner as Clint Barton? We score all eight characters' ferocity and pick a winner after the jump.
RDJ looks slightly disoriented as Iron Man, unfortunately. He looks like he's searching for a fuse box in an Avengers HQ blackout. Chris Hemsworth still looks less like the god of thunder here, and more like the god of a 1988 volleyball tournament at Will Rogers beach. I'm not seeing much grit in either combatant.
Downey: ★★ (out of 4)
Hemsworth: ★½
That Chris Evans under there? He still resembles a specialty American Gladiator maybe named "Jingoism," but that's kind of fun. Meanwhile, Ruffalo's unassuming Bruce Banner looks like a TV psychic or the American replacement host for Anne Robinson on The Weakest Link. There's some subversion there, but not enough to make the post interesting.
Evans: ★★
Ruffalo: ★½
Much better. Samuel L. Jackson's murderous glare as Nick Fury is pleasantly terrifying, and he really makes the leather ensemble work for him. Tom Hiddleston is offering the same campy glam as he did in Thor, but his vogueing ball chutzpah is fabulous in a superhero poster. These guys move right to the top of the class.
Jackson: ★★★★
Hiddleston: ★★★½
Jeremy Renner? More like Generic-ky Renner. Between Hawkeye's drab costuming and uncommitted mugging, he looks like he's ready to star in a mildly rambunctious romcom, not a superhero super-feature. Scarlett Johansson, however, is packing the Nordic finesse of another Johansson as Black Widow: Ingemar. That's the "Hammer of Thor" fearsomeness Mr Hemsworth is lacking. Her ass silhouette is also quite fetching.
Renner: ★½
Johansson: ★★★½
That puts Jackson in first place with Hiddleston and Johansson pulling in for a silver and bronze finish. Now: Your verdict?