The 2008 holiday hit Marley & Me might not seem like an ideal candidate for a sequel since, uh, you know. But there it is, just sitting in my inbox: "Hear Marley Speak for the First Time in MARLEY & ME: THE PUPPY YEARS." And it gets better.
In all reality, the straight-to-video follow-up does make sense when you realize that the first film -- starring Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston as married journalists who learn life lessons after adopting, interacting with and eventually euthanizing "the world's worst dog" -- reportedly raked in almost $70 million in revenue on DVD and Blu-ray. (That's in addition to its $240 million global box-office haul.) So even if the Grogan family adopted the canine from a litter shortly after birth and wound up burying it years later near their favorite tree, no self-respecting studio like Fox would allow the laws of time, physics and mortality to interfere with a bag of fledgling franchise loot.
Except wait: Marley talks?
Listen: We can be as revolted as we want, but if this is what putting America to work looks like in the doldrums of 2011, then by God, get me to Walmart or Sam's Club, where this film is available exclusively starting tomorrow. Especially if it's the creative brainchild of Michael Damian -- stage veteran, 18-year Young and the Restless cast member, and now director of such family efforts as Flicka 2, Moondance Alexander and A Princess For Christmas.
But you probably know Damian as the '80s pop heartthrob who sang "Rock On":
Believe it: The guy who sang "Rock On" has co-written and directed a sequel to Marley & Me. For the record, the movie is about this:
Fall into puppy love with "the world's worst dog," who now has a frisky voice and an attitude to match. Join Marley for his mischievous puppy years, as he and his summer pal, Bodie Grogan, wreak havoc on a neighborhood dog contest. Marley outwits Dobermans, Shepherds and Collies, while stealing hearts in his own unique and lovable way. Get your paws on MARLEY & ME: THE PUPPY YEARS and fetch big laughs for the whole family!
Spoiler: THE DOG LIVES.
[Photo: Fox Home Entertainment]