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Watch Taylor Lautner in the Second Abduction Trailer: An American Werewolf in Trouble!

Oh, no; Taylor Lautner's life is a lie! In the new trailer for Abduction, Twilight's crybaby sex wolf enters a world of intrigue and fear -- and I do mean the fearful stare of Sigourney Weaver, who suddenly resembles Christopher Walken when acting terrified. Will Taylor Lautner be smooth enough to survive when he's stripped of his identity instead of his clothes?

Did I see a second or two of a wrestling match at the beginning there? Might this be the Vision Quest remake that only I requested? Hmm?

So, what was your favorite moment of hilarity in this trailer? Taylor's "fear" look? Alfred Molina's grumbled, "They weren't your real parents"? Sigourney running around with balloons? They're all winners. For all of his likable oiliness in Twilight, Taylor Lautner is sort of an under-fascinating marquee star. This may awake some anger in you, but the fact is, he's no Shia LaBeouf. He doesn't do urgency or protagonism well, unlike our Disturbia voyeur. He drags his esteemed company down with him, too -- now Sigourney will never pick up that Oscar that she deserved for Working Girl.

VERDICT: The Bored Identity.

Watch in HD over at Apple.

[via Coming Soon]