Life handed us a traumatizing poster for Final Destination 5, and we're left to figure out why it's so dumb and scary. Remember that horrifying Green Lantern poster featuring a yellow-eyed Peter Sarsgaard? This is easily worse than that. Here's our list of 10 images that the new poster conjures; please contribute your own and help paint a word picture with us.
1. An average illustration in a high school freshman's Art I sketchbook
2. A Korn comeback album
3. An ill-advised Joan Rivers surgery
4. A Rob Zombie-directed version of the Yorick scene in Hamlet
5. A cute, skull-shaped golf bag full of irons and woods
6. Something Snoopy's brother Spike comes across in the desert
7. A shocked reaction during a The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion special
8. The fadeout still from Psycho
9. What I plan to do to the creator of Final Destination
10. That Peter Sarsgaard poster, actually
Yours? Let the healing begin.
Final Destination 5 (in 3D) arrives in theaters Aug. 12.
[via Yahoo!]