Oh, Hilary: We Need to Talk About the Resident DVD Cover Art

Hilary Swank's almost-lost film The Resident is disturbing for a number of reasons -- not the least of which is being a misbegotten, low-budget genre stinker that sends the dual-Oscar winner straight to video for the fourth time in seven years. (On the bright side, Jeffrey Dean Morgan is effectively creepy as her stalk-y, murder-y landlord.) And now, perhaps fittingly, the DVD/Blu-ray cover art has established itself as some of the weirdest of her career. Let's try to figure out what's happening here.

[Click the image at right for bigger.]

· Whose hand is that really groping Swank's throat?

· Or rather, whose throat is Swank's face glued onto?

· How does light that hits Swank's left illuminate Morgan from the right?

· They've got the old-school horror tandem of "Hammer presents..." and Christopher Lee, and yet he doesn't appear here? Oof! Missed opportunity! (Though he's hardly in the movie, either.)

· What's happening with Swank's hair? She's like a few snips from Matt Dillon's do in Over the Edge. Bring back the luscious locks!

· "She thought she was living alone..." More like, "She got a killer deal on a sweet loft overlooking the East River and Manhattan and couldn't put two and two together that maybe the whole thing was too good to be true until after she jilted the dude and he started living in her walls to espy a succession of exploitative bathtub scenes..." (Spoiler alert?)

Anyway, this is available March 29. Walk, don't run.