· Why is it that Suri Cruise is so captivating? I'll tell you: She's the most intimidating, stingy consumer on the planet, and she's serious about her drink order. Double-shot! Half-caff! Soy! Soy Chai, dammit! Mom, kindly tell this barista he could never play a Kennedy. (Slow end of newsday. Happy Thursday, everyone.) [JustJared]
· Simon Cowell's leading candidates for co-judges on the U.S. X-Factor are George Michael, Mariah Carey, and Paula Abdul. In other words, there's a 100% chance of crazy. [Zap2It]
· Aidan Quinn is joining NBC's remake of the British series Prime Suspect. [Deadline]
· In bizarre old-school casting news, Kid 'n Play once turned down the series that would become The Fresh Prince of Bel Air. [Cinema Blend]
· Guess which recovered addict thinks Charlie Sheen's fighting a losing battle? Oh, yes, world: It's Brett Butler. [TV Guide]