Now that the Academy Awards are over, the entertainment world can go back to what really matters: Charlie Sheen. The Ma-Sheen was all over television on Monday morning, with interviews on the Today show and Good Morning America (the full interview will air on Tuesday during a special edition of 20/20), both of which revealed him to be a chain-smoking, angry "warlock" (his word), among many other things. Ahead, the craziest Sheen quotes yet... until the next interview.
On his "anger": "I'm not angry, I'm passionate. It's everybody thinks I should be begging for my job back, and I'm just going to forewarn them that it's everybody else that's going to be begging me for their job back." (via Today)
On Alcoholics Anonymous: "I will not believe that if I do something then I have to follow a certain path, because it was written nice. It was written for normal people, people that aren't special. People that don't have tiger blood, you know, Adonis DNA." (via Today)
On whether he would return to Two and a Half Men: "I am a man of my word, so I will finish the TV show. I'll even do season 10. But at this point, because of psychological distress, oh my God, it's $3 mil an episode. [...] That's how I roll. Period, end. Defeat is not an option." (via Today)
On if he wants a raise: "Well, yeah. Look what they put me through. [...] I'm underpaid right now." (via Today)
On being modest: "I'm tired of pretending like I'm not bitching a total fricking rock star from Mars, and people can't figure me out; they can't process me. I don't expect them to. You can't process me with a normal brain." (via Today)
On his sobriety: "Look at me. Duh." (via Today)
More on his sobriety: "I'm on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available. If you try it once, you will die." (via ABC)
On how he got sober: "I closed my eyes and made it so, with the power of my mind." (via Today)
On if he's embarrassed his kids will read about his antics someday: "God, no, talk about an education! [...] 'That's the guy, and he's our dad and we can get all the answers and the truth. Wow, winning!'" (via Today)
On being bi-polar: "What's the cure? Medicine? Make me like them? Not gonna happen. I'm bi-winning. I win here. I win there." (via ABC)
On being worried about death: "Dying's for fools. There are certain blends I will not entertain because that's how people go down." (via ABC)
On his battle with CBS over Two and a Half Men: "We're definitely at war. The war is that they're trying to destroy my family. I take great umbrage with that. Defeat is not an option. They picked a fight with a warlock." (via Today)
On his life philosophy: "You either love or you hate. You live in the middle, you get nothing." (via Today)
On his perceived violence: "I think my passion is misinterpreted as anger sometimes. And I don't think people are ready for the message that I'm delivering, and delivering with a sense of violent love." (via Today)
On what he wants from CBS: "A big [apology]. While licking my feet." (via Today)
According to the New York Post, Sheen plans on suing Chuck Lorre, CBS and Warner Brothers Television for "mental anguish," and will seek $320 million in damages. "All Sheen has right now is time and money to destroy that little f*ck," a source told the Post about Sheen's hatred of Lorre. "Charlie's like a samurai warrior."
· Charlie Sheen Interview: A Special Edition of 20/20 [ABC]
· Charlie Sheen Demands 50 Percent Raise from Men [NBC]
· <a href="http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/fired_up_star_sues_Zu9BDxTxu1TKcM5wkvAZfN#ixzz1FGSJAgws
">Charlie Sheen set to sue CBS for $320M for 'mental anguish' [NYP]
· Charlie Sheen on ABC: Took More Drugs Than 'Anybody Could Survive' [USA Today]