During the sixth season of Weeds, which ended with a shocking twist on Monday, the Botwins assumed aliases, toured America in an RV filled with sex toys and realized that Silas's biological father (spoiler!) was still alive. But there were much stranger events that transpired during the latest iteration of the Showtime series. (Yes, even stranger than the time Andy impersonated his dead brother to access a bank account.) Let's review!
9. Nancy Spanks Shane For Killing a Powerful Political Figure
With no clue how to punish the murdering child she already screwed up (years of deadbeat marijuana-dealer mothering will do that), Nancy Botwin packs her family into the mini-van and flees to the Canadian border -- but not before delivering a swift spanking to Shane at a rest step. "I'm glad it was done," Nancy conceded about the murder, "But not by you! Now get back in the car!"
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8. A Hotel Patron Pays Silas to Read Aloud...Naked
Of course the Newmans (nee Botwins) could not submerge completely in their normal hotel jobs. During the first day, Nancy accepted $20 to clean up a hooker's urine and Silas accepted stacks of cash for reading to lonely old men.
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7. Doug's Life Is Spared By OnStar
After failing to lead Esteban's goons to the Botwin family, Doug digs his own grave, literally -- a chore he completes slowly while considering all of the people he will meet in the afterlife (Harriet Tubman, Patrick Swayze). But just moments before being shot in the back of the head, OnStar calls Doug's phone, notifying him of the Botwin's van.
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6. Nancy Finds Herself Inside a Seedy Seattle Hotel Room With a Broken Nose, an Anti-Abortionist's Crossbow, a Naked Brother-in-Law and a Stranger With a Warrant Out For His Arrest, When Child Services Knocks On Her Door
If you watch two scenes from this season, the following should be your first.
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5. Silas Wins (And Then Loses) a Winnebago After Eating a Butter Sculpture of Joe Montana's Head
After finally putting that anti-abortionist's crossbow to good use, Nancy drags her family to a State Fair where she convinces her son to eat 10 pounds of sculpted butter.
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4. Nancy Gets Drunk and Has Sex With a Married Trailer Park Bartender
Unlike in previous seasons, Nancy abstains from sex most of the time she was failing epically at her motherly duties -- until happening upon this gruff studly small town bartender played by Mark Paul Gosselaar.
3. Andy Buys a Severed Penis As Part of a Passport Scheme
Long story short: In order to get enough cash to buy fake passports, Andy agrees to kill a wealthy man's future son-in-law. But Andy does not want to actually kill a person, so he fakes an Al-Qaeda-style execution on video. And when asked for proof -- in the form of his hit's appendage -- Andy buys a penis from a morgue.
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2. Nancy Moves Her Family In With the High School Math Teacher She Slept With As a Student...Who is Now a Deadbeat Mailman and Avid Sky Mall Subscriber
...And played by Richard Dreyfuss. Some Weeds fans credit new writers for the sixth season's return to grace, but I credit Dreyfuss entirely. His three-episode arc at the end of the season provided the show with much-needed levity and humor that for once, was not provided by Justin Kirk and Kevin Nealon.
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1. Nancy Puts Her Family on a Plane to Copenhagen, Narrowly Escapes Airport Parking Lot Execution
And if you only watch two scenes from the last season of Weeds, this should be your last: the shocking twist from Monday's finale.
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