Gone were the corncob pipes, Kevin Bacon references, and homemade comics from Bored to Death in last night's episode, "The Case of the Grievous Clerical Error," which pitted George at the center of a, well, grievous clerical error and found Jonathan and Ray chasing down an ugly dog in Brooklyn. But the latter pair did so on a vintage yellow double bicycle so that has to count for some hipster points, right? Proceed ahead for the full Hipster Quotient.
Number of Bottles of Cheap White Wine Consumed Without a Glass: 1
Number of Grey Gardens References: 1. Jonathan tells Leah, "The [apartment] is very Grey Gardens at the moment. I've been writing."
Number of Vintage Yellow Double Bicycles Ridden by Ray in Red Hook: 1, while on a date with a girl he picked up at a comic store.
Number of Near Make-Out Sessions Overanalyzed: 1. After nearly kissing Ray's ex, Jonathan blurts out: "I am stoned and tipsy. We only leaned. A lean means nothing. I have bad posture from depression."
Number of References to a "Secret Cheap Side": 1. Describing his ex, Ray tells Jonathan, "Not once when we were going out did she raise my allowance."
Number of Vintage Yellow Double Bicycles Ridden by Jonathan and Ray Through Brooklyn While Searching For a Dog: 1.
Number of New Yorker References: 2.
Number of Times Olympia Dukakis Hit on Zach Galifiankis' Character: 1. "That's what I used to like in my younger day's: To feel a man's weight. It helps you forget your troubles." / "That's what's wrong with a lot of women these days. They don't appreciate heft."
(This is not integral to the Hipster Quotient by was disturbing enough to be noted.)
Number of Times Ray Ran Away From Jonathan While Wearing a Vintage Rugby Shirt: 1.
Number of Dogs Ray Saved and then Subsequently Ran Through Brooklyn With: Approximately 12.
Number of Wrong Operating Rooms Jonathan Broke Into Before Finding George: 1.
Number of Tongue-in-Cheek Baha Men References: 1, As Ray freed a dozen trapped canines, he muttered, "I'll tell you who let the dogs out."
OVERALL: While last night's episode severely lacked in the marijuana reference and chunky handknit sweater departments, it was touching to see Ray help his ex-girlfriend track down her ugly pooch in Brooklyn and to hear him order "a glass of your worst white wine" for Jonathan. Here's to hoping that the pair are hired to track down a first edition copy of a biography of Che Guevara next week, only to be paid in European cigarettes and homemade beer.