Your character in You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger, Charmaine, isn't exactly a nice person. But for an audience, it's hard to hate her.
One of the few things that Woody said to me was, "I don't want the audience to hate her. I don't want her to be the baddie." You know, to not be too annoying and not to come across as manipulative. And to try and find a way to make her likable. I thought there's something kind of almost weirdly, for a prostitute, innocent about her. I just thought that every time she's lying, she's not doing it to be devious, it's like a child reinventing her truth.
She does seem to care a little about Alfie (Anthony Hopkins); she certainly isn't repulsed by him.
Absolutely. She wouldn't have married him, otherwise. Certainly that's the way I wanted to play it when he asked her to marry him. She's in shock. I think the opportunity comes up and she's like, "Why not?"
For people who see this and Dinner for Schmucks back-to-back, they're seeing you wear a lot of interesting outfits.
(Laughs) I know! Gosh, Dinner for Schmucks, all of that black leather... Yes, it was unusual. I've never played, in my whole life, two characters like that: Sexy albeit repulsive. That kind of ferocious, grotesquely sexual character. Certainly for this movie, it really helps with the character. She's someone with no inhibitions. I wanted to be able to be totally open, physically, and let it all hang out -- have no shame, or body shame, or insecurities. Yes, it was a lot of fun wearing those ludicrous outfits.
It's hard not to think a relationship might be doomed when one of the first conversations includes the line, "I won't give you AIDS."
Yeah! (Laughs) I think that I love that line. It's also her sense of humor. She's being funny, she's making a joke -- but it's just so crass, awful. But actually quite truthful because that's probably what he's worried about, something like that. What is he getting himself into?
He mentioned that he was more concerned with herpes.
Herpes ... [AIDS] hadn't even occurred to him. She's got no filter, whatsoever.
I can't image the "laying on the floor being sexy, waiting for Alfie's Viagra to kick in" scene is an easy thing to do.
That was really, really funny, that scene. We did it on the second day it was shooting. That was the fall -- that take isn't actually in it now, but when I first fell on the fur, I just did a fall and the crew laughed...
I've heard to never trust crew laughter.
Yes! And [Woody] says, "That wasn't funny." I guess there was, perhaps, an awareness of the joke. But, no, I just had to completely let go and be totally free. Watching that movie back I see my leg opening, and all of these shots up my... I'm like "Oh!" I'm completely mortified. But, you know, I just really let go of it all because I had to. It was a challenge, but it helped that I looked like a totally different person and sounded like a totally different person. I just felt like I could let it all hang out.
How many times have you been asked so far, "So, what's it like working with Woody?"
Everyone asks that...
I refuse to ask that.
Everyone! Anyone who knows about the movie, all my friends, "What's he like?" You hear so many different stories of what the experience is like for an actor. For me, it was my greatest experience. I was given a huge amount of freedom to say what I want and to do what I want. There's a huge amount of it that's really fun; I see stuff that Anthony and I just totally came up with together. Although [Woody] doesn't give you a lot of praise, he was very kind to me and was aware that I was taking over the part from Nicole Kidman, who pulled out. All I could think was, Anthony Hopkins in a Woody Allen movie. I've been working for 10 years but I hadn't had an opportunity like this.
I've heard, as far as making things up on set, that Jay Roach was the same way for Dinner For Schmucks.
Yes! Oh, definitely. With Jay there was a huge amount of improv. And, sadly, of course, hardly any of that ends up in the movie. That movie was epic. I'd say half of my stuff is funny lines or jokes that we just came up with. With Jay, yes, he is a great director but he's almost the opposite of Woody in that he's very chatty and he lets you know when he likes something. Steve Carell is the most spectacular ad-lib improviser ever. And just doing a scene with him, it's just one incredible topping himself on every take.
He's extremely well trained in improv.
He is! But to watch it is amazing. You just want to go, "What is going on inside your head?"
It's easy to say this now, but I don't feel Nicole Kidman would have worked quite as well in this role. It was better not thinking to myself, "Ah, there's Nicole Kidman playing a prostitute."
Well, listen, Nicole Kidman is an Oscar-winning, fabulous, spectacular actress.
Just my humble opinion.
That's very much appreciated. But, yes, I think she would have done it very differently. And I think it probably would have been better.
No...
[Laughs] She's Nicole Kidman! She definitely would have been taller.
I've heard you say that before, so I was expecting you not to be very tall. I'm six foot and you're almost my height. So how exactly tall is Nicole Kidman?
[Shows me her heels] She's very tall! And I did it in this very London accent, and I don't know if she would have done that.
Of your numerous upcoming projects, which one are you most excited about?
I'm really, really excited about Bad Teacher, especially because it's quite a big part. It's with Cameron Diaz, Justin Timberlake, and I'm the good teacher. And I was really pleased because that's a totally different character in terms of how I look. It's a broad comedy in a way, still, but I'm this very sweet Midwestern school teacher with very frumpy clothes and a big red wig.
Do you live in London or L.A.?
L.A.
When did you decide, as an actress, that you had to move?
About four years ago. When I moved there I got a part in a TV show...
The Class.
The Cl-ahs. _The Cl-ass. [Mimes my Midwestern accent]
Sorry, I'm from the Midwest, originally. I speak funny.
I love the Midwest accent. I just did a movie in, where was it, Philadelphia?
I'm not sure that's really the Midwest.
It wasn't in Philadelphia. Where was it?
Chicago?
Maybe it was Chicago. So anyway, I was doing a Midwestern [accent], or at least trying to do one. What were we talking about? Oh, The Cl-ass. So I moved to L.A. to do The Class. The Cl-ass.
That is a solid Midwestern accent -- I approve. Why did you leave The Class early?
I left a few episodes early because I think they were constantly changing the contract. I could have stayed, but I wanted to try something different. It was so exciting, I was so excited when I got the role; I was so excited about the opportunity. To be honest, and I may regret saying this, the idea of playing the same character for a very long time is very daunting to me. Certainly the financial security is very, very appealing. I had gotten to a stage where I was pretty broke and this show came along and I was like, "Ah!" And, of course, there were wonderful writers and wonderful actors in it. But the show wasn't doing that well and there was an opportunity, against the advice of my agent at the time.
That's a risky move.
It could have gone both ways. I'll be honest, if that show [had been a hit], I'd have gone, "Oh, why did I do that?"
Right, every website would still run a The Class recap and the cast would still have their picture on every bus in town. You'd be like David Caruso leaving NYPD Blue.
I don't even know who you're talking about. But something like that, yeah. [Laughs]
[Top photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images]