5 Movies Better Suited for Betty White to Remake Than Oh God

Oh God, indeed. According to Deadline, uber-producer Jerry Weintraub has just pitched Warner Bros. on the idea of remaking the George Burns comedy Oh God, with eyes on Betty White and Paul Rudd for the staring roles made famous by Burns and John Denver. The two haven't been contacted yet, but no matter: Now that this is in the ether, how long before it actually happens? And worse: Doesn't it feel totally uninspired? If the current Hollywood mandate states that Betty White must appear in everything, here are five movies better suited for her than a remake of Oh God.

· Harold and Maude with James Franco

This one writes itself: Wes Anderson directs, Franco plays himself playing Harold, and White gets to give new meaning to the various old lady sex jokes in her arsenal. Movieline HQ would basically explode with excitement if this actually happened.

· Sunset Blvd. with John Krasinski

It'll be like the Billy Wilder original, but with more "at my age..." jokes. That means Ken Kwapis directs, many of The Office B-squaders make appearances (Creed as White's loyal butler Max, perhaps?) and John Krasinski stars as hack screenwriter Joe Gillis. Of course, none of it will be as dark as the original, but just wait until you see the smirk Krasinski gives White on the poster.

· The Manchurian Candidate with Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock

Before you get on your high horse, consider: This remake will be a a political satire, see? And with Reynolds (in the Frank Sinatra role) and Bullock (in the gender-flipped Laurence Harvey spot) along for the ride, audiences will immediately think of The Proposal, and that means box office. Imagine the repeat business and MTV Movie Award-ready clip of White dressed like the Queen of Hearts...

· The Rock with Jennifer Garner

White stars as a former sexy cat burglar, who has been imprisoned since the '60s. Garner is the by-the-book federal agent tasked to handling her while the government attempts a dangerous search and rescue at Alcatraz. Spoiler alert: The big reveal at the end is that White is married to Sean Connery and Garner is their daughter! (Apologies to Claire Forlani, who played Connery's daughter in the original.)

· Gran Torino

Every actor needs an iconic last stand, and for Clint Eastwood, that was Gran Torino, one of the more sneaky funny movies to get released in the last five years. So it's perfect for Betty! Change some stuff around -- less violence, but even more jokes -- set the thing in Cleveland instead of Detroit, and you've got a pedestal for Betty White that will allow her to do what even Clint could not: get an Oscar nomination.



Comments

  • stolidog says:

    Let's darken her up a bit...Silence of the Lambs. I can already see the poster with the face mask.

  • The Winchester says:

    She needs to be in a Lars Von Trier film.
    Stat.

  • Troofire says:

    How about EVERY WHICH WAY BUT LOOSE? She can play "Ma" Boggs.

  • Martini Shark says:

    Word on the street is Ratner is whispering about putting her in the lead for a remake of "Barbarella".

  • tjmooney says:

    Betty already "remade" Sunset Boulevard on The John Larroquette Show with Betty playing herself in the Norma Desmond role, with John as Joe and Estelle Getty as Max. 😉