Tonight, Dancing with the Stars makes its five remaining competitors get historical with their get-down. Hopefully Len Goodman will be able to spout helpful advice like, "Niecy, when I did the Charleston with my eight brothers and sisters to survive the Depression, we never bobbled our chest bombs like that. Sorry."
Dancing with the Stars [ABC, 8 PM]
Tonight the remaining couples perform songs inspired by different eras. Nicole Scherzinger may take on a Virginia reel, Evan Lysacek a Revolutionary War march, and Niecy Nash a medieval Viking rumba.
Two and a Half Men [CBS, 9 PM]
Alan plans a romantic night with his new girlfriend, played by Courtney Thorne-Smith, to step up the sizzle in his relationship. Should be pretty awkward for anyone who has even a passing familiarity with Charlie Sheen's life.
Real Housewives of New Jersey [Bravo, 10 PM]
Caroline's daughter's new boyfriend doesn't win over the Manzo family, and Jacqueline's daughter's naughtiness catches up with her. But all is not lost in the land of RHONJ daughters: Teresa and Danielle's children are invited to be models in fashion week. I'm getting prostitution tears in my whore eyes already.
Out of Sight [AMC, 8 PM]
A solid hit for George Clooney (and Jennifer Lopez's best film to date), Out of Sight concerns a bank robber and a Federal marshal who fall for each other. And if their dewy romance is too much for you, Ving Rhames and Don Cheadle tear up the proceedings in between shots of lingering Clooney sneers.