Pop quiz: You're producing a late night talk show and one of your guests for the next night cancels. What do you do? If you're the Late Show, your talent department speed dials Regis Philbin. If you're the Tonight Show, you cue up some last-minute Headlines or text message Chelsea Handler and ask props to come up with some kinky set ideas. And if you're the Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, you enlist that day's guest (Lisa Kudrow) to just tape four segments to spread across the next two shows and bribe your comedian friend to do a last-minute segment for free gin and tonics. Of course, the latter option has consequences, like a destroyed set, but those are the risks you take on CBS, as any CBS host would tell you. Click through for that clip, as well as the other highlights you missed last night while consulting your new psychic manager.
4. Disrespect a National Landmark and Then Your Wife
Ozzy Osbourne stopped by Lopez Tonight to share some stories (that his fans can relate to) from his autobiography I Am Ozzy. The first, if you can understand, is a story about walking around the Alamo in a green evening dress with a bottle of Courvoisier and the second, is a coke-fueled tale of how the rocker made a lasting impression on his wife.
3. Throwing the Set
Eddie Izzard (now available in documentary form) pinch hit on the Late Late Show last night -- which for him, meant destroying a few pieces of Craig Ferguson's furniture and discussing that space shuttle project.
2. Making Massa
There was one political scandal this week that provided infinite fodder for the late night circuit: allegations that disgraced ex-Rep. Eric Massa groped and tickled young men in his office. Last night, Jimmy Fallon delivered his take on the congressman in this mock Larry King interview.
1. Jay's Practical Joke Gone Wrong
Dana Carvey's ethnic impression-heavy segment might have rubbed a few viewers the wrong way last night, but there was one Tonight Show bit that thankfully did not come off as offensive or tiresome. In this pre-taped sketch, Jay Leno takes on practical jokes, drug dealers and people who don't think his monologue jokes are funny.