It didn't take much imagination to contemplate the tsunami of critical bile that would wash away even the most modest hopes for Kevin Smith's Cop Out. Indeed, as the film's Friday release date approaches, the film has made enemies everywhere from Movieline to Rotten Tomatoes. But one particular critic today took his skill for evisceration to some pretty profound new levels.
Give it up for Rex Reed, whose review of Cop Out stirs his trademark bitchiness, creative insults and apparent loathing for Kevin Smith into a frothy, toxic new cocktail I think we'll just call "the Hater." A taste, if you please:
The latest pollution from the celluloid dumpster is sub-mental horror called Cop Out, starring Bruce Willis and a screeching, eye-rolling, potty-mouthed comic named Tracy Morgan as the newest team in a seemingly endless stream of mismatched NYPD cop-buddy flicks [...]
The hack responsible for this miserable dreck is director Kevin Smith [...] whose zero talent as a director of such cinematic brain lesions as Clerks, Mallrats, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back and Zack and Miri Make a Porno has made significant contributions to the dumbing down of America [...]
The Willis-Morgan team is about as on point as four legs with the ankles missing. [...]
The sleep-inducing Cop Out was originally called A Couple of Dicks, so be grateful for small favors. An even bigger favor would have been burning the negative before it left the lab.
OK! So what's Smith's reaction? Well, it's complicated -- but thanks to magic of Twitter, it's complicated in 140 characters or less: "Dear Karina @VillageVoice," Smith wrote Tuesday in his most recent tweet. "Many thanks for absolutely getting it. I need not read another COP OUT review after yours." Oh, come on, suck it up. You can't reject magic!