10 Tips for the Makers of Ghostbusters 3

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All right everyone, it looks like Ghostbusters 3 is actually a go: a script's been written, the returning cast is tentatively confirmed, Ivan Reitman will be directing, and Sigourney Weaver is ready to spill secrets. Enjoy this honeymoon period while it lasts, because Ghostbusters 3 is a project full of potential peril. Here are ten bits of advice that the filmmakers ought to take if they want to avoid a final product that crashes under the weight of its own rebooted nostalgia:

1. Please do not have Kanye West remix the theme song or something

Look, I've already resigned myself to the fact that the filmmakers will incorporate Ray Parker Jr.'s Ghostbusters theme song somehow. Can't it be a snippet heard on the radio or a closing credits Easter egg rather than something that's going to be reimagined and desecrated by one of today's contemporary artists? I don't need to see Lady Gaga get her Zuul on in a music video. She does that anyway.

2. Don't just make this an Apatow movie with special effects

Judd Apatow might have a near-monopoly on some of today's most successful comic actors, but suiting up Seth Rogen, Jason Segel, Justin Long and their kin as young Ghostbusters is only going to look like laziness. Casting is everything, and you'll have every kid in town auditioning if you want it. Take the time to find some new talent!

3. Don't use Slimer

Slimer has already had his moment -- lots of them, in fact! We've seen him as a practical effect and as a cartoon character, and I think we can agree it should stop there before we see the weirdly tangible ghost as a CG creation (or worse, a motion-capped monstrosity suddenly voiced by Jonah Hill).

4. Don't redo the Ghostbusters logo

The original Ghostbusters logo is simple, iconic and notably 80's -- kind of like the movie itself. Why add a bunch of Photoshop filters and textures when half the fun of the logo is that kids want to draw it? Screw with that at your own peril.

5. Don't go "dark and gritty"

Ever since The Dark Knight became a megahit, it seems like every franchise reboot is intended to be dark and gritty, whether it's Nightmare on Elm Street or Spider-Man. Ghostbusters is no place for angst and tortured soul-searching. However...

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Comments

  • i would not be opposed to a lady gaga song INSPIRED by ghostbusters? or a lady gaga cameo?
    also no skinny seth rogan. in anything. specifically not this. remember how chubby dan aykroyd was in the films? keep that spirit alive.

  • slimer says:

    WHO YA GONNA CALL "GHOSTBUSTERS"

  • Ben says:

    Dear God I hope they don't screw this up. But I'm very nervous.
    In my opinion it's obvious that Bill Murray should be the lead. I have no objection to new Ghostbusters. It's been twenty years. Of course they would have brought on staff.
    But a movie ABOUT passing the torch? Instant death. Just do it naturally. There are younger staff already working for the team, Venkman is CEO, and take it from there, kind of like the group dynamic in Life Aquatic.
    There's no need for this to be Ghostbusters: The Next Generation. It should just be Ghostbusters.

  • Dimo says:

    I think making Ghostbusters III is about as good of an idea as is dogs and cats living together.

  • dweeb says:

    Remember Blues Brothers 2000? I fear that it will probably go in this direction. Very few remakes of iconic status can ever live up to the hype or the original material.

  • Daft Clown says:

    Slimer, you rascal!