Your Crane Stance is So 1984
· First Showing has the trailer to the upcoming Jackie Chan/Jaden Smith redo of The Karate Kid, which is still stubbornly holding onto the original title, martial arts discrepancies be damned! Don a pair of nighttime sunglasses and take a look, won't you:
· Ready to cringe? This Elle interview with Glee's Matthew Morrison starts out with "You must feel particularly proud being the first gay man to grace this page," is quickly met by Morrison's "I'm not gay," and just gets dumber from there.
· Did Billy Bush's tantrums drive Nancy O'Dell from Access Hollywood? Who knows, but Mario Lopez tweeted today that things are just fine over at Extra: "Thought it would be a slow week... but with Brittany Murphy's death and Tiger Woods drama it's busier than usual!"
· Speaking of Brittany, People has a photo from her final role. Sigh.
· Nurse Jackie is dropping Haaz Sleiman, who played gay nurse Momo and was the only thing that pulled me through the overpraised treacle that was The Visitor. Double sigh.
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Comments
In light of the possibility that my soon-to-be born child will one day catch a seminal several-decades-old film on (space?) TV and insist upon starring in a grotesquely unnecessary remake of same...I don't want to disappoint.
So I best get to work on becoming a celebrity by starring as a stereotypical white person living with an uptight family of estranged Chinese relatives (we'll learn from each other as I talk about mayonnaise a lot). Years later, I will earn an Oscar (Space Oscar?) nomination for my portrayal of Larry Bird in Ang Lee's Legend; not long thereafter, my kid ought to be in position to claim the lead role in Just One of the Guyz: 2026.
A Bush being such an asshole he makes everyone around him want to quit in disgust? Get the smelling salts!
The Golden Child is ripe for the taking. Don't sell yourself short!
So, Asian kids were slightly disrespectful to Will Smith's child, and that merits a re-make? Sad.
Also, I wish Matt Morrison was gay, so that we could get married.
Finally, I fucking LOVE Nurse Jackie, and Momo was one of my favorite things. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't cut him. He's awesome, and that show is the best thing to happen to Showtime... fuck, basically ever. Your first season is something that future series will be judged on. It's one of the best-written first seasons that I've ever seen, on par with The Wire. And he's a strong part of that. Please bring him back. We (the gays) love him. He's smart, strong, sexy, and relate-able. Don't alienate us when we love your show already. And don't be fooled: gays = nurses = fans of your show.
That is all.