During yesterday's Oprah Winfrey Show, Sarah Palin mistakenly called Levi Johnston's upcoming Playgirl spread "porn," a claim that Oprah immediately corrected for her television audience. There was a slight smirk and glint in the host's eye as she said the four-letter word; a reaction that hinted that today's "Porn and Erotica"-themed episode might be a carousing raunch-fest --Oprah Gone Naughty. And when today's show opened with a warning that the following material might not be appropriate for children (note: there was no such warning before the show about the woman whose face was chewed off by a chimp), it seemed that Oprah might finally be finding her freak.
Unfortunately for those viewers hoping for some spice before picking up the kids from strip mall Karate practice, Oprah seemed completely out of her element when discussing sex, porn or erotic pleasure. So much so that she enlisted special correspondent Lisa Ling to do the footwork. With Oprah's cameras, Ling visited a porn production where the stone-faced reporter killed any looseness on set by asking the female star, "So you're about to have sex with someone in about ten minutes. Do you know him?"
The referenced scene was then shown on air, with about 40% of the screen blurred out, as Ling sat by, looking as though she had just witnessed a mass suicide. Next, Oprah welcomed Jenna Jameson, the porn star-turned-entrepreneur and best-selling author, to the stage. Despite Jameson's comfort discussing the growing number of women in the industry, Oprah was visibly ill at ease and unsure of whether to use the phrase "make love" or "have sex" when describing porn.
Jenna eagerly shared that mostly women accost her on the street, thanking her for the careful sexual instructions she included in her How to Make Love Like a Porn Star: A Cautionary Tale. The host nodded, unsure of how to react, and followed by asking her how many sexual partners Jameson had. (Jameson skirted around the answer.)
Finally, Oprah threw to sex and erotica expert Violet Blue to finish off the dirty talk. Oprah's mouthpiece spent five minutes explaining everything Oprah could not bring herself to say on air, revealing that the reason why Jenna Jameson's most recent porn is so popular with women is because she co-starred with her husband at the time. Apparently, female viewers can sense that real life passion and want that for themselves. Occasionally, producers cut to a reaction shot of Oprah looking unconvinced. Then the segment ended...
Oprah: Violet, why do you think erotica is such a good tool for women?
Violet: Well, erotica can be as effective as a vibrator.
The host's eyes widen.
Oprah: I never thought about it that way.