Wracked with last-minute indecision over what you should be for Halloween this year? So am I! In fact, I've narrowed it down to three possibilities, which I've broken down to their most essential elements and laid out for all of you to see. Consider this the guys' companion piece to our Ladies' Guide -- but somebody please help me decide on which of these I should commit to, already.
Eli Roth as Sgt. Donny "The Bear Jew" Donowitz
Any character called "The Bear Jew" instantly jumps to the head of the costume pack, as far as I'm concerned, and Roth's Nazi-bludgeoning hunting champ certainly seems easy enough -- and more importantly, comfortable enough -- to pull off all night. Stuff your pockets with crusty, wadded-up Kleenex for extra verisimilitude.
Carl Fredricksen from Up
This one is sure to be popular, so prepare to run into other Carls over the course of the evening. Still, with most of the costume readily available at a Goodwill and party supply store, it's a sweetly sentimental choice. (Add a grape soda top button and drag along a chubby, possibly Asian sidekick in a Boy Scouts uniform to complete the look.)
Zach Galifianakis as Alan in The Hangover
Of the many pantsless options I weighed throughout my preliminary costume brainstorming sessions, none seemed closer to my heart than Alan, The Hangover's huge-hearted, toothless-granny-hooker-pleasuring, resident oddball. The T-shirt is sold at Urban Outfitters, but if they're sold out, I'll sell you mine. I think I'm going as The Bear Jew.