The oft-revived Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise, which is already set for a 2012 film revamp, is joining forces with Nickelodeon, the fearsome network that brought us almost 70 sewer-dwelling seasons of All That. The new CGI series will also premiere in 2012, which gives Nickelodeon more than enough time to incorporate three of its forgotten reptilian charms.
Clarissa Darling's Alligator Elvis: Jettisoned after just one season, the sinister pet of Clarissa Explains It All is an easy fit for TMNT heroics. I anticipate a move out of the wading pool and into a co-producer role at Channel 6 News. Perhaps we will even glimpse the forked tongue of a CGI-animated Judith Hoag.
Slime: Following the demise of You Can't Do That on Television, Nick's use of slime waned (apart from Summer Sanders's Mao-like reign). Bringing back slime as a foe for the humanoids could mean we actually learn The Secret of the Ooze, which has long been rumored to involve the comic acting of Alanis Morissette.
Famous Galapagos Tortoise Linda Ellerbee: Once upon a time, children closed out their weekends with reportage from a slow-moving, half-shelled matriarch named Linda Ellerbee. I swear. Actually, they didn't. Kids claimed to watch Nick News but were actually just waiting around for the sexually charged overalls of Nickelodeon's Roundhouse. I was there. Anyway, Linda Ellerbee's post as anchor of Nick News is missed by someone, and her trustworthiness is best exhumed in the form of an catchphrase-spewing mutant. Cowabunga, Fourth Estate.
Ninja Turtles Move to Nickelodeon [Variety]