Twilight Barbies Stealing Avatar Action Figure Shelf Space, Decry Angry Fanboy Collectors

Behold your first glimpse of the official Twilight line of Barbies -- an important distinction from action figures, in that these aren't intended to be accurate depictions of the franchise's characters, so much as loosely sketched, immaculately outfitted interpretations using doll templates from the Barbieverse. As such, it's something of a happy coincidence that Ken/Edward is the spitting image of Robert/Edward, right down to his spindly legs, piercing yellow gaze and lush crown of hair. Sold separately: The Forks Barbie Vampire Dreamwagon!

We can only hope that once Walmart begins stocking the collectibles on Nov. 1, it won't lead to a rash of gender wars throughout America's discount superstores -- all instigated by Avatar-hungry fanboys, who feel their beloved Sully and Neytiri poseable figurines have been unfairly squeezed off of store shelves in order to better serve the icky, doll-obsessed Twilight girls who've haunted them since Comic-Con.

· FIRST LOOK: Twilight Barbie Dolls Are Here! [People]



Comments

  • NoWireHangers says:

    At long last! The tools with which to carry out my Twilight slash fiction. Where's the Taylor Lautner doll?

  • Kyle Buchanan says:

    I don't recognize Ken without a fake-bake and massive pectorals.

  • Lowbrow says:

    Replace all Twilight actors with these dolls immediately to facilitate a Team America/Twilight hybrid for the third installment in the series.

  • stolidog says:

    Some of these dolls are in for a really rough road. I can just imagine what some people have in mind when they buy them.

  • snickers says:

    (Bella Barbie's cannabis accessories not included. Each sold separately.)

  • Christopher says:

    If they really wanted to capture K Stew & R Patz portrayals, they should have carved these out of wood.