Though posting the picture above may get me into hot water with Summit Entertainment and child protective services, I feel it is my duty to help all you non-Conners understand the moment where thousands of female audience members simultaneously orgasmed, menstruated, gave birth, and passed out. It came during a Taylor Lautner shirtless scene from the New Moon preview that could only be described as "ludicrously fantastic," and we have it for you (until they're onto us!) after the jump: