Well, this seemed inevitable in retrospect, didn't it? Bravo has announced plans to shoot its latest reality docudrama at Fred Segal, the semi-secluded Hollywood shopping mecca where A-listers and publicists alike go to pick up Seven Jeans and overpriced, indifferently-served Caesar salads. (Don't worry, though: they'll be shooting at the Santa Monica one that nobody goes to.) Think you've got an idea of what this series is going to be like? We certainly do, and here are our predictions:
Breakout Star: Sales clerk Bobby G., whose Manic Panic-streaked hair, fluctuating weight, and cutting asides ("Would you like some lunchtime lipo with that Lacoste polo?") nab him featured placement in Bravo's inaugural ad campaign. Later, Bobby G.'s on-again, off-again relationship with Spencer (personal shopper for Lionel Richie's second wife) will earn the show a GLAAD award and a separate pilot presentation that does not go to series.
Biggest Celebrity Wrangled To Appear: After a series of drop-ins from stars at the level of Caroline Rhea and Holly Robinson-Peete, the season finale is unexpectedly classed up by the presence of Ralph Fiennes, who has finally chosen an inopportune time to acquiesce to his unlikely BFF, Bravo exec Andy Cohen. "Little-known fact," reveals Fiennes. "I'm the world's biggest collector of Ed Hardy graphic tees."
Amount of Bravo Crossovers: After catering to the arduous demands of Rachel Zoe, Jeff Lewis, some but not all of the Real Housewives of Orange County, and Tabatha Coffey for some reason, the shopgirls face their biggest challenge: a possible celebrity that staff showtune queen Morning Glory (male) identifies as former Queer Eye guru Jai Rodriguez. His face is pixelated before air.
Series Tagline: "Drama, Half-Off."
Episode Order: 8, reduced to 6.